Febuary 23, 2011

Wow! I cannot believe its already almost March.
I'm blown away at how fast time flies by. Its gonna be a year in May since I've graduated high school.. Thats just Bizarre to me! And only like 47 days until I'm 19.
 I feel like the last 7 months have been some of the most amazing months of my entire life. I truly feel alive. Every breath I breathe has purpose. Every step I take has purpose. The difference between walking as a daughter of the most high God and walking as a servant is mind blowing.
 Considering I gave my life to God when I was either 4 or 5 and I got baptized in the Holy Spirit when I was 7, I've always known a life with God. And I feel like there was a good portion I did live my life with the reality that I'm a daughter of the most high king. But there is also a large amount of my life that I did not take a hold of this reality.  And considering that these mindsets effect everything I do and don't do, I'm extremely thankful that I now have more knowledge about the difference now.
  Daughter of the Most High King- When I do the things I do, I do them because I love my Daddy God and I want to bring joy to his heart and love him in everything I do. Knowing that in Jesus I am made perfect as he is perfect.
Servant- I do the things I do out of a religious mindset. Feeling like I have to perform to be good enough, to be accepted. Trying to do things out of my own strength. Heaping condemnation on myself when I don't read my bible enough and just never feeling like I'm good enough. Trying to perfect myself.

Thats two COMPLETELY different ways of living life. And I never thought about the difference much growing up until I came here for this internship at the Dwelling Place. I hadn't fully grasped the idea that I am and will always be a daughter of the most high God and his desire is for me to live as one.
  I truly am thankful that this is where Jesus brought me to dwell for the next two years. I have never truly been this happy. I finally feel like I have the ability to live out everything that Jesus is placing in front of me.
I love that I don't feel like I have to perform anymore or hide who I am. And I love knowing that its okay to admit that I'm weak. Because when I am weak he is strong. And thats the best place to be. Relying on Jesus to be my strength in every situation.
I love knowing that my worth is the cross. The cross where Jesus shed his precious blood so that I could be free. I am a princess. A daughter of the most high king.  And I deserve the best.
  It took a long time to understand that Jesus says that I am beautiful and there is no blemish in me. That he sees me in the spirit. He knows my heart and loves me anyways. He sees who I am in him and not who I am in the flesh. <3 I love that. I am his precious daughter. His bride. I make his heart beat faster just one glance of my eye. He knows every hair thats on my head. He knows every thought I think. He desires to be with me. To have an intimate relationship with me. He loves when I tell him whats on my heart even when he already knows. He loves when I talk to him. He loves how I love him.
  I mean to forget this love and to ignore it would be the stupidest thing I could ever do. Why would I ever desire to live without my Jesus. I don't know how I ever tried. He passionately pursues me every second of everyday.
My desire is to please his heart. To love him in every way at all times. To be an example of who he is. To love like he loves..
...They will know us by how we love.. <3

-Sara Ashlee Cannon.. <3